A Novel in Verse and Other Poems With Audio Recordings

He got his milquetoast affirmation 
From aphorisms that he’d daily read
Mass produced for inspiration
Printed on the tabs of bags of tea.
This was the first thing on his checklist,
Spiritually speaking. Over breakfast,
He pondered how at work he might
Love Generously and Be a Light. 
Sometimes, the maxims caused confusion
With instruction. So, he’d pause
Ruminating upon karmic laws
Fearing imminent disillusion.
It was times like these he’d fickly think,
“I’ll find a different brand to drink.”

The shopkeeping seems on certain days
When you insist on being crude
To set our collective ire ablaze.
You put us in a dismal mood.
For when you foist your platitude - 
“I brought my own.” It makes us gag.
Despite the karma you’ve accrued
We couldn’t care you brought a bag.

Your ineptitude it does amaze
As it pertains to cooking food.
Negotiations for a braise?
For you such skills seem to elude.
And as for soup? You’re simply screwed!
Embarrassing that you would brag
‘Bout steak that scarcely can be chewed.
We do not care you brought a bag. 

For diet fads, your fickle praise
Betrays an understanding skewed.
“Soy beans will kill you!” was today’s.
We simply shake our heads and brood.
For we’d get fired if we feud
And that would clearly be a drag.
So silently we’ll keep you clued
And still not care you brought a bag. 

At any rate, I’ll now conclude.
Don’t goad your grocer. Just be glad
They’re bagging. Quiet. They’re not ones who’d 
Remotely care you brought a bag.